The Deceit of Angels

Continuing the tale of my epic journey across the land of China, a brief five hour flight - almost directly South - and we soon found ourselves in the blistering heat of Hong Kong; a land that was once a British colony before being handed back to the Chinese in '97, filled with expats and people that actually speak English . You can read about the first part of my escapade here . Day one and we arrive in Mongkok, the most densely populated place on the planet. But I mean, how bad can it be? Oh it's pretty bad. I spent my time here sharing a 8x12 foot room with Alex on the 8th floor of a 16 floor building on a road that you can't physically see for all the god damn people on it, waking up each morning to the sound of Alex standing butt naked in front of me doing his hair and yelling "don't look! don't look!" The shops cover multiple floors with signs hanging everywhere. We're only 4 floors up from a Cat Café (the Café Idea) for example. Guess wher...

I should probably open with explaining that during the time of planning this trip - an idea I've been knocking around since the NYC trip when I really began to travel the world - it was thought that Alex was to be moving abroad. He still might be, in fact, and so as a send off we both decided to try and make this the most epic adventure of our lives. Epic mission accomplished. We were blessed by a Buddhist Monk and explored the vastness of the Great Wall just a day after Tom Cruise went to the same spot (crisis averted! We avoided that short-assed scientologist prick)! I taught Alex about self-reliance and survivability by abandoning him in a country where nobody spoke a single god-damn word of English, learned how to dance the Chinese National Dance, were repeatedly stopped for photos - an idea that quickly turned into "only if we can get one of you in return," often to much giggly enthusiasm - and jumped from a 233m building living to tell the tale. Welcome to the obs...

"Gun... Line... Box... Batman T Batman. Ooh! The place where I eat!" - A Westerners guide on how to look for a gimbap in South Korea (gimbap is a sort of sandwich made using some form of filling wrapped in rice and seaweed). I fear I might be one trip ahead of myself in terms of titles. Prague was named Gangnam Style, then I travel a stones throw from Gangnam. Now I'm making Blade Runner references, yet I'm told my next trip might make it an even more apt title. Let me, however, clear up a few things right now, as this was the most common only question I was asked by friends who knew of my visit. No, I did not go to Gangnam. It's a posh upper class area that I suspect is rather uninteresting, out of the way from central Seoul, and not worth my limited time in the capital. Nor did I meet PSY. The population of South Korea is only a little short of the population of the UK, and that's assuming he was even in the country. Dude's kinda international th...

Apparently it's become something of a meme in S. Korea, and I asked Alex to get a video of me drunkenly doing the dance to complement this piece but... Well if I'm drunk, explaining anything to him is borderline impossible. Yet, nevertheless, gangnam style suggests to me 'I'm gonna look like a twat yet do it anyway because it could be fun,' which sums up a lot of this trip. And the whole 'heeeeeey sexy lady' part, well that fits too (hot damn). Apparently there's also a major subtext westerners missed out on about the materialism of the modern world. Well, that has absolutely nothing to do with this trip. In fact, if anything, Alex was at his least materialistic which is certainly something I should commend, even if it resulted in more photo's of me in the bathroom and hours of drunken woman chasing, but moving on: Alex owns a copy of 'Twilight' on blu-ray. I don't know why, but he does. And so it begins, the drive to the airport...

First night here and I feel I need to sing the praises of the riad (guest house) we're staying; a lift from the airport, a tour of the market and dinner that is already making the trip worthwhile. So good even Emily ate it with gusto, and she had difficulty finding food in the airport! The staff are attentive, helpful above and beyond what you would expect and they seem to genuinely care about their residents; the only way they could have done more would have been to guide us through each day as a personal guide, which obviously would be odd and impractical. Probably the best place I've stayed at amongst all my travels thus far and one I would have no qualms recommending to others, even if that front door is so small I feel like gandalf entering a hobbit hole. It's ranked 6th on tripadvisor for damn good reason. The only thing slightly disconcerting about the place is the security; no safe for valuables and no key locks to the doors (excluding the front door), just a bo...